Professor Wade Update

Hi viewers, I’m Mike Fingal bringing you all the news from around the galaxies right here, right now. Shortly we will be returning to our report on dessicated coconut and its uses around the home. But first, we go straight over to Bex Gregory on Aliarnus who has an update on the Professor Wade story.

Thanks Mike. Yes viewers I’m here at the St. Gwendolyne Hospital in downtown Aliarnus where we have just heard that Professor Wade will shortly be leaving. I have with me now Professor Harriet Guildham who has been at the bedside of the Professor during the entirety of his stay here. It seems congratulations are in order Harriet.

Congratulations yes, but mainly thanks. Thank you to all the kind Captains out there who made this day possible. We know of many people who made donations on a daily basis, sometimes three or four times a day, sacrificing their own personal goals to help us get Wade back. We can never thank these people enough but we offer our sincerest gratitude to all who helped.

And how is Professor Wade?

He’s fine.He took a rather serious bump to the head, he needs a few good meals and it will take him a while to get over his ordeal but yes, he will be fine.

Just going back to the day of the rescue attempt, it appeared not everything went according to plan.

No, you’re most definitely correct. During the countdown, a power coupling failed and I had to quickly try and re-route the power output through a subsidiary console. This caused problems as the secondary console didn’t have the capacity that we needed.

Can you explain to us what problems that caused?

Well it basically meant that the retrieval area was no longer big enough for the mass we were trying to retrieve. To put it another way, it was almost like trying to get a pint of milk into a half pint glass. That’s why when the transportation did take place there was such a lot of debris and rubble as the mass transported overfilled the volume of area it was supposed to arrive in and got squashed into it.

Is that where Professor Wade picked up his head injury?

Yes. He was struck by flying debris that caused him to suffer a concussion, but it could have been so much worse than it was.

And…yes, here comes Professor Wade now. Professor, how are you feeling?

Hello…Miss Gregory isn’t it? I’m feeling much better thank you and extremely happy to be here and able to tell you that.

Did you think for one minute that you would ever get back after your experiment went wrong?

I must admit that when the experiment was complete, the jump had been made, I looked around at what had come with me and I had a terrible sinking feeling in my stomach. I could see straight away that most of Dipsi had come with me and it would take a miracle for me to ever get back. But I also knew that if anybody could get me back it would be Harriet.

And, if rumour is to be believed, I hear there is another reason for congratulations.

Yes, I believe you’re right. You see, myself and Harriet have been working together on this project for almost seven years. Day in, day out, we have worked at making Dipsi a success. All the time we were working together I marvelled at the beauty, the intricacy, the intelligence of the machine we were creating but not once did I realise that my co-developer had all of those qualities in abundance. The time I spent alone in that alternative dimension gave me space to think about what was important, and it dawned on me that the thing that made me the happiest was working alongside Harriet, having her close, sharing our thoughts and ideas. And so, as I came round and found her sitting by my bedside, I finally found myself able to express to her all that she meant to me. And after quite a few tears, a lot of laughing and some intimate moments, I asked her to marry me and I’m glad to say she accepted.

Wow. And how do you feel Harriet?

I can’t stop smiling. I feel as if everything has finally fallen into place and I look forward, after such an agonising three weeks, to the future with renewed hope.

So, Professor Wade, what now will happen to Dipsi?

Well, while I was stranded, I also came to the conclusion that the experiment hadn’t experienced a failure as such, but had in fact been fundamentally flawed from the beginning. I must admit, it shook me to my very core, but I have to say that the mistake was mine and I realise that this project is too big for us alone. With that in mind, we have decided to pass Dipsi and our research over the to proper authorities and we believe it will be the next Galactic Research project. We will of course be on hand to offer our services, but not until we have enjoyed our wedding ceremony and a long honeymoon somewhere where we can relax together and begin our married life.

Well I’m sure I echo the sentiments of all our viewers when I wish you both the very best for the future. I’m Bex Gregory bringing you wonderful news from Aliarnus. Back to you Mike.

Thats great Bex, nigh brings a tear to your eyes. And now back to our report on dessicated coconut and its 1000’s of household uses.


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